In the UK, more than 170 women have been murdered by their sons in the past 15 years. An anonymous mother reveals what it is like to be frightened of your child while desperately wanting to support him

I am staring at the faces of women on my screen, transfixed by emotions too complex to disentangle; discernible, though, are grief, rage... and fear.

For the women pictured are some of the more than 170 who have been killed by their sons in the UK in the past 15 years. Their appalling tragedy – being killed by the person to whom they gave life – has a chilling resonance. Like many of those whose deaths have been highlighted in the 2,000 Women report by the Femicide Census, I am a professional with adored adult children and a close circle of friends. I am also frightened of my son.