The inaugural award bestowed upon the US president could pave the way for many more colourful accolades. I have some ideas ...

What a privilege it is to be alive in such a peaceful and prosperous time. If you ignore the genocides in Sudan and Gaza, fighting in eastern Congo, continued attacks on Ukraine, military airstrikes in Myanmar, near-daily strikes on Lebanon, “extrajudicial killings” on Venezualan vessels, increased political violence in the US, along with various other inconvenient issues, then I think we can all agree that Donald Trump has ushered in world peace.

Good luck convincing the nasty Norwegians on the Nobel committee of that, though. They’ve doled out peace prizes to many an alleged war criminal but have a weird grudge against Trump. Still, at least Fifa, an organisation renowned for its impeccable ethics, appreciates the president’s efforts. Last Friday, Trump was awarded the inaugural Fifa peace prize in an over-the-top ceremony that would have made a lesser man, one burdened with a smidgen of self-awareness, feel like a prize idiot.

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The reporter’s alleged affair with Robert F Kennedy Jr raises a whole host of questions, few of which get answers in this pretentious memoir

Did he take me seriously?” Olivia Nuzzi wonders in the midst of her infamous alleged affair with Robert F Kennedy Jr. Nuzzi, then Washington correspondent for New York magazine, has just learned that she and the Politician, as she calls RFK Jr in her new book, may overlap during a visit to Mar-a-Lago. Nuzzi, worried Donald Trump will catch on and start spreading rumours, convenes an emergency meeting with the Politician to strategise. RFK Jr – who has denied having an affair with Nuzzi – doesn’t see the big deal.

So, she agonises “Did he take me seriously?” and reflects that she had “little cause to consider the question before now.”